RIP Vine : Thank You to The People's Stage

We live in a world filled with comedians but most of us don't have the right platform to showcase this talent, Vine came and bridge the gap between us and the worl and Vine gave us the stage to showcase our talents.

  Vines are short videos which are done by an app which features other video sections, somewhat like a video mix. it gained prominence on the comedy scene as it came like a virus and left no survivals from your next door neighbor to Kevin Hart, Drake, Dwayne Wade etc

Today's Words and slangs didn't pop  out of nowhere. But are the products of vines. Words like 

Really n*gga, 

You not my Dad,

"Bruh, "

"B*tch hunhah,"

"Oh hell naw", 

"Barely," 

"Mama I luh you", 

"POP hold it down"

That's why this article is an thank you to Vine as a platform and a thank you for the relentless viners  who through their funny videos made our everyday lives bearable by creating a solace of exchange in which we sighed our problems to and they exchanged it laughter through videos that leave us smiling in our sleeps.

We thank them for their Herculean efforts as we can go to our Instagrams and laugh. As I, like others ran constantly to YouTube to download compilation of vine for the months and Year as if I hadn't seen it in the monthly compilation. Trust me the longer the better

   It was heartbreaking for me especially and for a whole others when Twitter said they will shutting down the vine app

Vines are intelligent videos that show us relatable comedies in relatable environments like our houses, the mall bringing out the child in us and letting us shoe our id once in a while. Filled with intelligent jokes Like :Telling a demon to take a cough drop because he has a dry voice Remixing hip hop songs like "

Young n*gga soothe that throat", as a remix for Future's Move that dope".

The funny part is when guys try to imitate their girlfriends, mothers or grandmothers by wearing wigs like my favourite viner Darius Benson whose trademark was a blonde wig. Others tied towels on their head or above their chest.

Early Vines started slow as you can still notice the naivety in their usage as they were mostly in dialogue.  The constraint was the ability to make sense, do or say something funny, and make it understandable within 6 seconds. Which is a very hard thing to do. But with time it got increased to 14 seconds but with the level of expertise this viners displayed their talent 6 seconds seem too much.

But King Bach who started early with an envisaged passion for vine made us laugh with his facial expression, his comb, and  his popular "Ayo ma, lemme have your number"

One of my best vines of his is when he said something funny and the guy laughs and touches the guy's lap and immediately the song changes to

" hoe, hoe she's a hoe" funny and relatable right. God knows I always think like that

 This were the things that droves us to vines and made us even practice some of the things we see on them. I can't count how many times I have given people the b*tch look or said "really nigga"

The good thing about vines it replicates your action. Doing what you would have done in that situation if not funnier

Another thing vine did was to show the world just how connected and similar we were.

Imagine me laughing at Brandon Bowen joke about  your grandma forcing you to eat which is exactly what I go through.

Brandon Bowen also showed that a condition don't affect how you should feel about yourself. In one of his vine about Halloween he went trick or treating and he was asked 

"where's your costume"?

"What are you supposed to be"? Which he answered

"Childhood Obesity! Is that scary enough for you".

Kids also made vines interesting ad their innocence made vines even funnier and real. From Mr. Ruthless whose "don't say that" made him very popular that it became a  phrase to the little unruly kids in the ghetto who fell under the umbrella of the tag name "Lil Tyrone"

Bryan's "Gratata" showed us that stupidity just like the speck of dust in the galaxy was plenty, everywhere and diversified.

Video clips from movies and other funny videos were also used to add effects and make them more funny. From Kevin Harts stand Up Comedy came:

" She wasn't ready, "I wanna go home," "sit  the f*ck down", "Come lookie here", and the gaze of begging where he stretched his head sideways.

Popular among them also was, the Ice Cube, and Chris Tucker combined "Daayummn" which serve as expression for a Person getting roasted, or a person taking a beating 

                   

Vine Made Celebrities

    In 2011, A female by the name of Donna Goudeau was arrested for stealing from a 75 years old man. At her arraignment some things were said and the reporter who innocently recorded what would be the last desperate words of a regretful woman who wouldn't be going to the mall anytime soon. But little did she know those where the events that would lead up to the making of a star.

Trying to say final words to her mama and her squad her shaky voice as a result of sniffling, withholding tears and acting tough interfered giving her the most sonorous voice of "Mama I Love you" which became her hit single in  vine, other hits include "pimp squad baby for life", "I'm innocent", "can't I see I'm legally blind", and "Barely". 

As DJ's mixed the hell out of them 

Call it A blessing in disguise . As Mama I love you became popular, Vine inadvertently turned a convicted criminal into a famed celebrity. Out of sight,out of mind, Donna Goudeau popularity meant the opposite and it led to the clamour for her release with the #FreeDonnaGoudeau campaign. Thanks to Vine

    Sharkeisha became the next GTA character after giving a girl the beating that should last her generations because the embarrassment and trashing should transfer into her genes and modify her children and great grandchildren into model citizens and probably nuns and priest as the video showed her kicking and beating the living hell out of the girl who was named Shey.

She was later arrested for assault but the assault on the victim mentally and socially was left for viners who looped in videos like the popular "Dayuum" and others

SMACK CAM

Smack Cam which was the use of camera to give your Friend a slap from the back the idea was to create surprise and shock from the intended.

But it went from funny to hilarious to absurd and finally landed on scary. As it was surprising what people did all in the name of smack cam as parents were smacked by their children. 

And it finally degraded to fart cam which to me was not so funny because it was just disgusting. But we all have different threshold for jokes so maybe it was.

VINE Music

     Vine Musician are people gave us the soundtrack of our vines from PTAF Boss Ass B*tch, OGMaco You Guessed it, Bobby Shrumda Hot nigga, Bruno Mars - Treasure, and so on

These songs either solemn, happy, with awkward lyrics, idiosyncrasies, or with wordings that coincided with how you felt fit perfectly into vines to determine mood, and perfect jokes. Daruis Benson Wrong Theme song vine is a good example in which the song being played doesn't relate with the scene.

"Tell him the next I see him ama kill alright " and Venassa Carlton Thousand Miles is played which is supposed to be a love song

But kudos to Bobby shrumda whose about a week ago coinciding with the shmoney dance. Made the word a taboo among youth at that time as hearing that phrase meant hitting the shmoney Darius explains it with his vine  " Our generation as Doctors"s he hits the shmoney after he asked

" When did you start getting symptoms?'

Other viners like Jerry Purp showed it in his vine that amidst the heartbreak you still hit the shmoney "when asked when your girlfriend left you",

          

The Acknowledged Ones

Now we move over to the Professionals
These are our vine heroes who dedicate hours of their time to make perfect vines
Herculean because for you to think about the joke, and be able to act it and give the fitting facial expression for it. Reeks only of genius
An example from my personal favourite Darius is his vine of when you walk into the room and everybody is talking about you.

    Rudy Manusco aka speedy simone, aka Mr. Take it Easy and his funny "Mi Madre" jokes My favourite vine of his is Hispanic Santa "He knows when you ve been sleeping ... Just leave some milk and cookies and tequila", 

With incredible musical talent as you can occasionally see him playing piano for Justin Bieber.

Partners mostly with Christian Delgrosso, Brandon Cavillo,  Curtis Lepore, King Bach

   Darius Benson my man. You should get the hint that he is my favourite what we learn. Super intelligent and his face speaks volumes from "my goldfish died on a Tuesday" I fell in love with. Amazing juggling skills,and his grandmas impression. 

CEO hiphop Disney which is a mashup of hip hop songs and classic Disney cartoon. My best is My uncle killed my daddy made me feel some type of way - I know it did" laughing while writing this.

Watch his videos on Facebook to get the toll free number and full explanation 

Nerd Rap genius. And occasionally awkward Dad armed with his neat dude head warmer pair of glasses and his blonde wig. He is good. 

Partners mostly with Brother Cam Benson  whose vine about "when Step Dad Calls you Son, you not my dad" is my favourite

Partners also with his Buddy Wellington Boyce, Landon moss, Allicatt, Drea Knowbest

    King Bach..undoubtedly the King of vine as he used vine to create a million dollar empire for himself. Occasionally dancing to seeing himself being interviewed on TV as he couldn't help but show what it meant to him. Floyd's cousin and Mr. Lemme have your number, Mr you got that Gas money? . My favourite vine of his is the One where he showed us the universal language which is sex by holding his left index finger and his thumb and inserting his right index into the hole, which the Hispanic girl understood and they jumped away merrily titled "love is love"

Partners with De storm power , splack, Arantza, Liane V, Curtis lepore, Christian Delgrosso, Page Kennedy and almost everybody

   Reggie Couz armed with his moustache and his identity could Change from His impression of a Black Dad, to wahsed up artist Dirty mercy, or Pastor Riley, and he is very good at it. especially his Dad, Uncles impressions using his vines to campaign #stopparents2016 which is aimed at curbing the excesses of parenets who try so hard to fit and understand us or literally take our words out of context or dont find our jokes funny. and bully us.
Favorite of his is all his black dad vines they are very funny esp. The black out punches.
Teams up sometimes with special k, Darius, buy like Darius he acts alone making it more interesting.

    Jerry purp is another funny person known for his legendary tears, he is the best at screams and cries as he knows how to make his face ugly and act childish. also known for  his water melon addiction, the Jordan Fairy and Sponge Bob dominated past. favorite vine is when he tried to inject himself with water melon juice and was caught by Anwar 

"You need help Bro, You f*cking need help Bro"

Teams up mostly with napaikid, max, piques, king Bach, Anwar Jibawi

Wuz good an amazing talent who has indept Knowledge of jokes, and real life situation comedy, i particularly like his vine on WWE Referees and how he exaggerated their rolling on the ground, that was epic
Partners mostly with Page Kennedy, Splack, Brandon Cavillo, my favourite vine of his is when you are put in the friend zone,
"Hey Josh meet the Homie Wuz" - friend zone (drive by shooting) go go

    David Lopez AkA Juan. The only Juan. Husband to his Juanita who isTea Lopez his wife and best Friend as he makes funny Mexican jokes like his cover of Lorde's Royal " I just wanna be legal"

Partners most with Josh Darnit, His son Evan and his Cousin Jesus

My favourite vines of his is the cover of Alicia Key's girl on fire " this grill is on fire " and tapatio on my everything.

Vine Popularize dances moves like the shmoney dance, and nae nae, and the latest reverse as I learnt a few nae nae, yeet from Tee Rio, Jerry Purp, Napaikid, King Bach who did celebratory dance when the screen of their iPhone is not cracked after falling on the floor.
Till today I still dance like Ray Ligaya to Uptown Funk.

Vine has changed the lifes of most of this viners turning them from your normal neighbourhood guys to celebrities. As most of them are employ the skills they honed from vining to advertise certain products.
It also change the lives of ardent viewers like me showing us that we aren't alone and the ability to live out lives knowing somebody somewhere is making the same mistakes we are making. Not the didacticism you were expecting but it gives me relief that there are many people like me out there. And that kinds of boost my self esteem. And laugh a little maybe a lot.

Vines paved the way and blazed the trail for people to create Instagram videos and Facebook videos within time limit of their choices making Instagram almost as addictive and engrossing as YouTube. Chiefing on that platform is Nigerian own crazeclown, Chief Obi, Kanmi, African Ape and a whole others

Through vines we have lived through them and watch them grow. I was then when Juanita told Juan she was in love with Jesus in which Juan almost killed Jesus his cousin. And now they are married with a son named Knightley. And you see yourself in their lives and they will continue to be our own home made celebrities and the promise that anyone could be a star.
          Thank you Vine........Or nah

by vinehead Victor Samuel.