All of life’s strife is forced on, like the life itself, Forced with life, many of us stumble across till we get to the marsh, not knowing what we are doing, following social constructs, but if only we could find whom we could laugh at and with the journey might be easier.
There are four types of love: Ludus, Agape, Pragma, and Eros
Ludus stems from play and the vivre de joi,
Agape is the impossible one, the literal heart giving type of love
Prgama have to do with the functionality and rationality of love, which involves security, food and clothing
Eros is love making and the sport of it
I opine that of all these Ludus is the greatest, it is that which men are the most fond of, and the tide of most damnation that which streams tears at burials and makes the heart fonder.
Society places a lot of burden on men making them lose their sense of self and humour at a very early age, they pick the frown as the easiest face to wear, it shun off distractions and happiness, makes them more easy to fear and respect
But every man needs a place where he needs to let his guard down, somewhere he can be himself and fully settle into his inner child, without shame, judgment or embarrassment
To be able to talk like a child, kicks his legs in defiance, nestle his head softly on a lap and look up in complete vulnerability
Sadly a lot of relationships tend to ignore this part of relationships, they focus only on Pragma and Eros which involves most times the man spending money and his energy,
Ludus is the fundamentality, it is the child that we look in the mirror and see an ageing face on, the child that never goes away, and the child we desperately want to be and feel like.
It is the closed eye laughter with the totally out stretched tongue, it is the fart whose hot air put our hand and grab and put in our nose for confirmation
It is the mucus we peel or let drip from our nose and allow into our mouth, it is the armpit smell, the nether region smell, the playful laughter, the butt shakes, random dropping of pants and boxer briefs and wearing them back to avoid being caught
Sometimes adulthood can be such an act, we all just want where we can come home to. Somewhere only we know, and we need someone who can afford us that, someone we are so close to, we can walk naked on and someone who don’t have to psycho analyze our every action, someone who we can fart beside, talk to, I mean really talk to, no gimmick no accent. Someone you can be totally free with
Life hits us hard always, we need to still remember that we were all children some years back and many of the things we find out in life we find out for the first time, with no advice given, learning to trudge on with the vestiges of experience.
We need someone who understand our apprenticeship in life and laugh out our mistakes with us, not excluding the loss of job, or the loss of a child. Someone who can still bring back us back to home no matter how hard it is at the workplace with an annoying boss or co-worker
Someone who can bring us back to home whenever the loss of a parent, friend or relative might seem too much to bear, someone who shares our own sense of humour
A sense of humour is underrated in relationship, you have to be sure that you have and share the same thing, which is why watching similar movies might make for good conversation and listening to the same music leading to the much needed sapiosexualism and deep rooted affection for each other
One of my favorite catch phrase that takes me home all the time is “Ah I will tell for you” the colloquial version of “ I will tell on you” which I used to say as a child growing up.
I say it to remind me sometimes of my inner child. I say it to her, and she says to me, automatically making every moment cute and cuddly unlocking random grabs and kissing with more “Ah I will tell for you, if you do it again, I will tell for you!!!”
“If you kiss me again, I will tell for you”, of course that makes me want to kiss her all the more, and fall in love all over again, like a child even in the heat of passion she might say its slowly “I will tell for you” And I will repeat it, bringing us closer all the more.
Life with love ain’t more than that, with it you can cry when you are frustrated, you can state your grievance without feeling shy or having any resentment towards her because every day you remind each other that you are children quite new at this life stuff and it will create a much needed patience and understanding for each other.
And when you become open to one another guess that is walking hand in hand swinging on the street with you, guess who you can bear to cheat on, because no one is as close as she is to you, Guess who you can’t wait to get back home to, all the while thinking to yourself which kind of play are going to do, and with play in mind the excitement never stops, and you find out more about each other in mock wrestling, boxing, at the swing, in the pool, at the beach, together in the kitchen, and it doesn’t have to be a prison But an escape, another world for just the two of you.
Telling for you
Victor Samuel
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